there is no X in espresso

Look closely - there is no X in the word espresso.

If you're one of the clueless dorks who pronounces the name of this beverage "expresso," there's no time to waste - run outside right now, stand up next to the nearest brick wall, and shoot yourself in the head.

No, no, no - don't try to explain, don't try to justify your behavior - there is no excuse. I don't care how cute it sounds when you cram in the x, and don't even try to blow a bunch of smoke at me about a lame play on words between 'express' and 'espresso.' Just go outside right now and take yourself out of the gene pool.